The Trouble with Transparency…….
The trouble with transparency, is you can’t hide anything!
transparency |tranˈsparənsē|noun ( pl. -cies)1 the condition of being transparent : the transparency of ice.2 an image, text, or positive transparent photograph printed ontransparent plastic or glass, able to be viewed using a projector.ORIGIN late 16th cent. (as a general term denoting a transparent object): from medieval Latin transparentia, from transparent-‘shining through’ (see transparent ).
I like the part of the definition that says “Shining through”. When we are transparent that is what should happen, the essence of our lives, (God), should “shine through” I have a confession to make, part of my essence has not been shining through, a part of my being has been blocked up with something to thick for the light to shine through, vengeance. If you have followed this blog, you know about the troubles that have transpired in my church. You, no doubt, have sensed that I’ve been very upset, angry, and at times livid about the circumstances taking place there. This morning I went to church for the first time in a month, (I was on the road all but 37 hours of June!!!)
Since the last time I attended my church, our pastor, and my very good friend, of 13 years, Tim Thompson has packed up and left, escaping th nightmare that has transpired. I was not ready to meet a new pastor, I hadn’t gotten over the one I had lost. I didn’t want to see many of the people of my church, as I’ve held them, at least in some way, responsible for not putting their collective feet down and stopping the madness. I went into the sanctuary with a bad attitude to start with. The first person I saw when walking into the back of the church was one of the key people that has instituted much of the change and anguish. By the time I got to my seat I was just about ready to explode. The enemy was more than happy to give me a long list of things I could do to show my displeasure and call the guilty, in my eyes, to task! I gripped my Bible, bowed my head, and asked God to calm me.
The pastor got up, and he is a kindly old man, about my age, and he seemed like a nice enough fellow, he opened with a scripture and then delivered a life changing sermon, (life changing for me).
2 Corinthians 12:7-10 New Living Translation (NLT)
7 even though I have received such wonderful revelations from God. So to keep me from becoming proud, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger from Satan to torment me and keep me from becoming proud.
8 Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. 9 Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 10 That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
He went on to explain how God had used a “thorn in the flesh” to make Paul dependent on Him. Paul had been the greatest of the disciples, and God had revealed so much to him that He knew it might cause Paul to think to highly of himself, and so He gave him a burden to carry that only God could help him face. Without God, Paul could not be His Servant. Only in our weakness can we truly be used of God, otherwise we would be allowed to start to believe that we were a big part of the success of God’s work through us!
Sitting in the church, listening to the sermon, reading the scripture, I fully realized that God was using these circumstances as thorn in my flesh. He had presented me with a situation that I could not change, and instead of yielding to Him and trusting Him, I had become bitter and angry, and was allowing it to block my relationship with Him. I realized that this was my thorn in the flesh! I could see clearly how my belief that I could do something about the situation had led me to depend on myself, not God.
At the end of the service I went down to the alter and poured my heart out to my Heavenly Father, I asked Him to forgive me for allowing my “self” to rise to such heights. I asked God to give me the strength through Him to forgive those that I’ve been detesting, and I released them to Him. It’s His battle, not mine. I asked Him to help me be the man He wants me to be, not the man I sometimes, falsely, have thought I was. I came off my knees knowing that a new day had dawned in my walk with Him. I was back in my proper place, leaning on Him.
A young lady sang a song that fortified what God had shown me this morning. It’s called Blessings
We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things
‘Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we have faith to believe
‘Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It’s not our home
‘Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise
The trouble with transparency, is you can’t hide anything!
In Him, more than ever,
the pilgrim
This entry was posted on Sunday, July 8th, 2012 at 3:19 pm
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Bill:
A powerful post. I’ve been exactly where you were before your new pastor’s sermon. Many times. And by the grace of our Father I’ve sometimes listened and humbled myself as you have. Church issues and squabbles are always difficult and don’t always turn out the way we want them to. But God is still on the throne regardless. He calls each of us to draw near to him even if we’re (sadly) far apart from each other.
I love that song. I listen to it when I’m down and need to be reminded of His sovereign grace. Not always easy in this life, but if it was we wouldn’t learn anything and probably not lean on His wonderful power and grace.
Take care. Keep up the great blogging!
Bob,
Thanks for the encouragement. I was so sure I was in the center of His will, then that scripture brought it all tumbling down. A good crash though!
Sounds like you had a GREAT morning. You always seem to find the right place to be at the right time.
Now, I still sorta believe that Snake, Chuck and I are little thorns that have been given to you to deal with, so quit asking for us to go away….. we are here for the long haul..
May the peace beyond understanding flow over you and your family.
jb
Ha! You guys are far from thorns, but you do have to deal with me,that may be the thorn!
Boy, did I need this today. I am of the firm belief that loving God is easy; church is hard. It’s no wonder people my age (37) don’t want to go. I’m the secretary and a Sunday school teacher at ours, and I don’t want to be there! It’s hard to admit it, as I’ve been a lifetime member, but it is what it is. Luckily, God is bigger than any building, so I’m sure to find Him wherever we go.
He is in control!